fabian aramais seacaster (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
maximumlegend) wrote2024-04-26 08:23 pm
maximumlegend) wrote2024-04-26 08:23 pm
etraya ic inbox.
▶︎၊၊|||||၊၊၊|။||||။၊|။ 0:20
You have reached a MAXIMUM LEGEND!
[ Considering Fabian doesn't exactly expect Gorgug's disguise, he doesn't even realize the other is already present until Gorgug speaks his name. Until that moment Fabian is just very calmly standing there and sipping his drink, perhaps even having looked in Gorgug's direction as the other approached before looking away again, still waiting.
It's only upon the realization that he properly looks at the other, turning his head back with his one eye growing wide in surprise. Fabian doesn't even manage to say anything at first. He just-- stares. Completely baffled. Some parts of Gorgug are still recognizable enough, but it's..
Gods, it's mostly the eyes that are throwing him off. Gorgug's change of skin color is one thing, but the eyes feel so weird when Fabian is used to staring into the darkness all the time. It's hitting Fabian with even more surprise considering he didn't even think for a moment about disguising himself. (Or, let's be real, just changing his ears, considering that would be all Fabian has to do.. Many regular humans have tattoos just as obnoxious as Fabian's own..) ]
... As a human? [ Obviously.
But Fabian is still looking so utterly baffled that his brain probably can't think of something more intelligent in the face of this other than the obvious question he's asking right now. ]
It's only upon the realization that he properly looks at the other, turning his head back with his one eye growing wide in surprise. Fabian doesn't even manage to say anything at first. He just-- stares. Completely baffled. Some parts of Gorgug are still recognizable enough, but it's..
Gods, it's mostly the eyes that are throwing him off. Gorgug's change of skin color is one thing, but the eyes feel so weird when Fabian is used to staring into the darkness all the time. It's hitting Fabian with even more surprise considering he didn't even think for a moment about disguising himself. (Or, let's be real, just changing his ears, considering that would be all Fabian has to do.. Many regular humans have tattoos just as obnoxious as Fabian's own..) ]
... As a human? [ Obviously.
But Fabian is still looking so utterly baffled that his brain probably can't think of something more intelligent in the face of this other than the obvious question he's asking right now. ]
[ Gorgug isn't sure how to feel about the way that Fabian's looking at him--proud of how well his disguise has worked, or awkward? Both? The latter feeling is winning out, and Gorgug shrugs, black eyebrows stitching together in a similar fashion to how his own usually do. ]
Most of the people here are human? [ It's a human world, even if not everyone fits the standard definition of human, appearance-wise. Some even look like genasi. ] My skin makes me stand out, so... and I'm part human.
[ In a way that's never recognised, and even feels peculiar for Gorgug to acknowledge. But he thought about his mother, with this disguise--from the photos of her side of the family, of her brother and her around the time before she fell pregnant with him. ]
Most of the people here are human? [ It's a human world, even if not everyone fits the standard definition of human, appearance-wise. Some even look like genasi. ] My skin makes me stand out, so... and I'm part human.
[ In a way that's never recognised, and even feels peculiar for Gorgug to acknowledge. But he thought about his mother, with this disguise--from the photos of her side of the family, of her brother and her around the time before she fell pregnant with him. ]
[ Fabian is.. trying to think of all the machines he can think of...
Fri.. dge? Sure. Does a tap for water count as a machine?
To.. as.. ter..??
He blinks. ]
Gorgug, what is a toaster? [ Sorry, bro, are you not aware yet of exactly how bad Fabian is at using a kitchen. Maybe he's even used that thing once or twice in this place without even knowing what it's called.. ]
Fri.. dge? Sure. Does a tap for water count as a machine?
To.. as.. ter..??
He blinks. ]
Gorgug, what is a toaster? [ Sorry, bro, are you not aware yet of exactly how bad Fabian is at using a kitchen. Maybe he's even used that thing once or twice in this place without even knowing what it's called.. ]
I don't want you to feel bad.
[ It sounds muffled, even though Fabian's face is clearly pointing upwards. He wouldn't do a dramatic fall onto his stomach, after all. He's just lying there on his back. Spread eagle. Spread out as much as dramatically possible in this moment.
Maybe it's just that he's mumbling. Pouting. Like a little kid throwing the world's most melodramatic tantrum. ]
I just want us to have fun. Camp's been awful. [ And though Gorgug doesn't seem very forthcoming with details about what he's been doing-- Well, it doesn't exactly sound like it was a funfest either. ]
[ It sounds muffled, even though Fabian's face is clearly pointing upwards. He wouldn't do a dramatic fall onto his stomach, after all. He's just lying there on his back. Spread eagle. Spread out as much as dramatically possible in this moment.
Maybe it's just that he's mumbling. Pouting. Like a little kid throwing the world's most melodramatic tantrum. ]
I just want us to have fun. Camp's been awful. [ And though Gorgug doesn't seem very forthcoming with details about what he's been doing-- Well, it doesn't exactly sound like it was a funfest either. ]
[ Gorgug is part human.
It's something Fabian doesn't really think about a lot, really. Gorgug is just Gorgug. He doesn't really think about how both of them are half human, despite the fact that the human part is clearly much more prominent with Fabian than it is with the other. Then again - it's way easier to think of yourself as simply a mix of your parents when you have seen said parents a lot. Fabian's hardly even seen Gorgug's biological parents.
Is that why it feels so utterly weird to see the other without the orc part of himself?
Fabian opens his mouth, no doubt to say something stupid and impulsive. It's the look on the other's face - that slight awkwardness - that gets him to stop, first closing his mouth again to use his brain for a moment. Mostly to realize that-- okay, he really doesn't want to say something here that might hurt Gorgug. He cares about Gorgug and Gorgug's happiness too much.
So, slowly trying, Fabian's own drink going ignored in his hand for a moment-- ]
Do you like looking full human?
[ See, once he has Gorgug's opinion on this, he can much better decide on what he can or can't say here. You don't start a date off by insulting your boyfriend. Fabian is trying to be his best self here, especially when they might end up dancing! ]
It's something Fabian doesn't really think about a lot, really. Gorgug is just Gorgug. He doesn't really think about how both of them are half human, despite the fact that the human part is clearly much more prominent with Fabian than it is with the other. Then again - it's way easier to think of yourself as simply a mix of your parents when you have seen said parents a lot. Fabian's hardly even seen Gorgug's biological parents.
Is that why it feels so utterly weird to see the other without the orc part of himself?
Fabian opens his mouth, no doubt to say something stupid and impulsive. It's the look on the other's face - that slight awkwardness - that gets him to stop, first closing his mouth again to use his brain for a moment. Mostly to realize that-- okay, he really doesn't want to say something here that might hurt Gorgug. He cares about Gorgug and Gorgug's happiness too much.
So, slowly trying, Fabian's own drink going ignored in his hand for a moment-- ]
Do you like looking full human?
[ See, once he has Gorgug's opinion on this, he can much better decide on what he can or can't say here. You don't start a date off by insulting your boyfriend. Fabian is trying to be his best self here, especially when they might end up dancing! ]
[ Gorgug crouches, since talking to your boyfriend (or probably most people) at such a height as his isn't very fun, and it doesn't seem like Fabian's going to immediately get up.
Because Gorgug needs to put his shoes on. Which he does remember a moment later, and sits so he can reach for his trainers and slip back on, but before that: ]
We can have fun. I'll go have fun with you. [ Though, he has to wonder- ] Is camp just about doing the most stuff here the best? Are we getting marked?
[ What have they even been doing here? Just random activities? ]
Because Gorgug needs to put his shoes on. Which he does remember a moment later, and sits so he can reach for his trainers and slip back on, but before that: ]
We can have fun. I'll go have fun with you. [ Though, he has to wonder- ] Is camp just about doing the most stuff here the best? Are we getting marked?
[ What have they even been doing here? Just random activities? ]
[ Does he like it?
It's a complicated question, but also not at the same time. There's a shift in his brows, not showing that complication any less, but when he speaks-- ]
It's not my face. It doesn't feel like me.
[ --so comes through the 'easy' part of the problem. This isn't him. Would he like it if he could somehow make an entirely human version of himself? Would that make a difference?
Gorgug isn't sure, and it's not something he can do right now, so it doesn't matter. Instead, he looks down at his hands, the same ones that he's looked at before in using the disguise gadget to shift his form. ]
I like being me.
[ It's easy. It's simple! It's him. And that is a good enough assessment from him. ]
It's a complicated question, but also not at the same time. There's a shift in his brows, not showing that complication any less, but when he speaks-- ]
It's not my face. It doesn't feel like me.
[ --so comes through the 'easy' part of the problem. This isn't him. Would he like it if he could somehow make an entirely human version of himself? Would that make a difference?
Gorgug isn't sure, and it's not something he can do right now, so it doesn't matter. Instead, he looks down at his hands, the same ones that he's looked at before in using the disguise gadget to shift his form. ]
I like being me.
[ It's easy. It's simple! It's him. And that is a good enough assessment from him. ]
[ Okay. Yeah. Same assessment as Fabian - which is a good thing, considering the thing he was worried about was saying Gorgug looks better as a half-orc when maybe Gorgug's own feelings on that would have been a little bit more complicated than that.
Apparently they're not though. It makes Fabian drop any and all filter he was trying real hard to hold onto a moment ago, deciding it's unnecessary now. Instead he shifts his drink to the hand that's further away from Gorgug, so he can use his now-free closer hand to reach up and touch the other's cheek, Fabian's fingertips only slightly disappearing into the side of Gorgug's hairline.
He leans in a little closer.
(It might involve just a touch of tip-toeing, but don't point it out.) ]
I miss your tusks. [ It's not a complaint, for the record. Not a usual Fabian style complaint, where he starts groaning and huffing. Instead he's grinning as he says it. Playful - even a little flirty in a way he doesn't bother to hide. He already wasn't caring about people staring at him for looking a little odd, why would he care about people staring because he's getting a little handsy and sweet with his own boyfriend in public? ]
Apparently they're not though. It makes Fabian drop any and all filter he was trying real hard to hold onto a moment ago, deciding it's unnecessary now. Instead he shifts his drink to the hand that's further away from Gorgug, so he can use his now-free closer hand to reach up and touch the other's cheek, Fabian's fingertips only slightly disappearing into the side of Gorgug's hairline.
He leans in a little closer.
(It might involve just a touch of tip-toeing, but don't point it out.) ]
I miss your tusks. [ It's not a complaint, for the record. Not a usual Fabian style complaint, where he starts groaning and huffing. Instead he's grinning as he says it. Playful - even a little flirty in a way he doesn't bother to hide. He already wasn't caring about people staring at him for looking a little odd, why would he care about people staring because he's getting a little handsy and sweet with his own boyfriend in public? ]
Edited 2025-08-16 21:20 (UTC)
[ O-oh. Gorgug tips his chin downward, not leaning in closer himself after Fabian does, but the touch and motion does seem worth lowering his head for. Or maybe it's Fabian's face that does it, the way that he speaks, and what he says with it. This isn't a face that Fabian cares much about either, and Gorgug smiles, small and fond, still a little reserved. ]
I still have them, [ he admits; a detail that Fabian may or may not already know, but with that way Fabian is speaking to him-- ] You can feel them. If you wanted to.
[ With a kiss. Gorgug doesn't say it outright, but there's a playfulness in the suggestion that Gorgug attempts to get across; even though, with Fabian's hand right there, he could just touch them with his fingers.
But they're flirting right now, right? They're flirting? Wouldn't it be more fun with lips? In the usual way Fabian's mouth catches against the side of one of his protrusions. ]
I still have them, [ he admits; a detail that Fabian may or may not already know, but with that way Fabian is speaking to him-- ] You can feel them. If you wanted to.
[ With a kiss. Gorgug doesn't say it outright, but there's a playfulness in the suggestion that Gorgug attempts to get across; even though, with Fabian's hand right there, he could just touch them with his fingers.
But they're flirting right now, right? They're flirting? Wouldn't it be more fun with lips? In the usual way Fabian's mouth catches against the side of one of his protrusions. ]
[ Gorgug glances to see if Fabian's wearing his earpiece.
All it needs to be is a glance. The communication device sits easily, noticeably on Fabian's ear when it's there, and Gorgug doesn't spot it as they have this time together. At Fabian's apartment, Gorgug bringing over a bag of the pins, necklaces, and bracelets he's duplicated and made to nullify the effects of the anomaly. He's also got a stronger design, too, and told Fabian he wanted to design one as Fabian would like it.
He's got a design in mind already. But on the table, enamel pins and bracelets in a stain glass-like design, with cartoon brains or X's with writing of 'MINDFUCKS? NO THANKS', 'SAY NO TO ANOMALIES' may not bring much hope to Gorgug's creativity for Fabian's personal, updated pin.
Fabian's is different. Gorgug slips off his own earpiece before he takes the pin out from his hoodie pocket, and holds it out for Fabian to inspect.
It's a silver flower--a tin flower, decorated in the same fashion as the one on his holster, with a golden sheet wrapped around it that sparkles softly in the light. ]
I thought about making it 'hoot growl', [ he explains, the pin sitting in his palm, ] but I thought--this was more us. The flower, you dancing...
[ The pin and the earpiece have nothing in common.
But Gorgug will get there, eventually. ]
All it needs to be is a glance. The communication device sits easily, noticeably on Fabian's ear when it's there, and Gorgug doesn't spot it as they have this time together. At Fabian's apartment, Gorgug bringing over a bag of the pins, necklaces, and bracelets he's duplicated and made to nullify the effects of the anomaly. He's also got a stronger design, too, and told Fabian he wanted to design one as Fabian would like it.
He's got a design in mind already. But on the table, enamel pins and bracelets in a stain glass-like design, with cartoon brains or X's with writing of 'MINDFUCKS? NO THANKS', 'SAY NO TO ANOMALIES' may not bring much hope to Gorgug's creativity for Fabian's personal, updated pin.
Fabian's is different. Gorgug slips off his own earpiece before he takes the pin out from his hoodie pocket, and holds it out for Fabian to inspect.
It's a silver flower--a tin flower, decorated in the same fashion as the one on his holster, with a golden sheet wrapped around it that sparkles softly in the light. ]
I thought about making it 'hoot growl', [ he explains, the pin sitting in his palm, ] but I thought--this was more us. The flower, you dancing...
[ The pin and the earpiece have nothing in common.
But Gorgug will get there, eventually. ]
[ It seems that the other has made the right decision with the design of the pin - because Fabian is looking through the other items with quite the judgemental look on his face. It seems like he's not up for a 'SAY NO TO ANOMALIES' bracelet, apparently..
(Look, he's got style to keep up! Does he know these are important? Sure, but looking good is just as important to Fabian, thanks!)
So he's a little more hopeful when Gorgug seems to have put some effort into something more personally meant for Fabian. He looks over at the other's outstretched hand, takes the pin to give it a proper look, and then--
Then nothing. At first. Fabian just stares at it, the judgy look from a moment ago gliding right off his face the longer he stares. Making it more suited for him personally wouldn't surprise him coming from Gorgug - it's just what the other is like. But Fabian thought that Gorgug might have made some simple golden design, more like regular jewelry, the kind Fabian would wear.
This is definitely more than that.
Of course he knows even before Gorgug explains. That's exactly why he's staring. This pin-- It's them. And though they regularly kiss and have sex, somehow this feels just as intimate as that to him. Even though it's only a pin. (Maybe it's for the same reason he does always wear Riz's hideous BFF necklace under his shirt every single day, despite it not being his style - because Fabian is a sucker for receiving something that's a symbol of his bond with someone else.)
His face darkens. It's not a blush though. Not at all. Don't you dare call it a blush, because he might just cry, alright!!! It's not a blush and he is VERY COOL in this moment!!! ]
It, uh.. [ ... Even when he finally speaks up, he just.. pauses.. Still with that dark blush on his cheeks.. ] It's real nice..
[ No, he is not choking up mid-sentence there. You're imagining it. It's fine!!! He's fine!!! He's not being emotional at all!!!!! FIGHT HIM!!!!!! ]
(Look, he's got style to keep up! Does he know these are important? Sure, but looking good is just as important to Fabian, thanks!)
So he's a little more hopeful when Gorgug seems to have put some effort into something more personally meant for Fabian. He looks over at the other's outstretched hand, takes the pin to give it a proper look, and then--
Then nothing. At first. Fabian just stares at it, the judgy look from a moment ago gliding right off his face the longer he stares. Making it more suited for him personally wouldn't surprise him coming from Gorgug - it's just what the other is like. But Fabian thought that Gorgug might have made some simple golden design, more like regular jewelry, the kind Fabian would wear.
This is definitely more than that.
Of course he knows even before Gorgug explains. That's exactly why he's staring. This pin-- It's them. And though they regularly kiss and have sex, somehow this feels just as intimate as that to him. Even though it's only a pin. (Maybe it's for the same reason he does always wear Riz's hideous BFF necklace under his shirt every single day, despite it not being his style - because Fabian is a sucker for receiving something that's a symbol of his bond with someone else.)
His face darkens. It's not a blush though. Not at all. Don't you dare call it a blush, because he might just cry, alright!!! It's not a blush and he is VERY COOL in this moment!!! ]
It, uh.. [ ... Even when he finally speaks up, he just.. pauses.. Still with that dark blush on his cheeks.. ] It's real nice..
[ No, he is not choking up mid-sentence there. You're imagining it. It's fine!!! He's fine!!! He's not being emotional at all!!!!! FIGHT HIM!!!!!! ]
[ Of course Gorgug is nervous. Of course he wants to sneak glances at Fabian's face more than he is, but he practices restraint, nibbling on his inner lip as he waits for Fabian's assessment, his reaction. The pin is hot on his skin, Gorgug wishing the other would take it--not because it literally burns. But it's for Fabian. Fabian should be taking it. He should be inspecting it close and casting his judgment!
So even hearing him say, it's real nice, in that disjointed way--Gorgug feels his heart do something funny in his chest, his own cheeks flicker with a warmth that isn't sure if it'll stick around. Because Fabian likes it? Maybe? He thinks? ]
Thanks. [ There's some strain in his voice, a higher note than it should be. He looks at Fabian, then down at the pin, and he no longer wants to look at it, and so finally decides to hold it to place in Fabian's own hand. Once he offers one. ] I-- I can change it, whenever you want. While we're here-- I don't know if I'll be able to do it when we leave.
[ This place has definitely given him a cheat code for his tinkering, and he wouldn't want to ruin it, once they're back on Etraya. He still has to think and make the design. It still takes time, even though he can control where each part goes easier. ]
So even hearing him say, it's real nice, in that disjointed way--Gorgug feels his heart do something funny in his chest, his own cheeks flicker with a warmth that isn't sure if it'll stick around. Because Fabian likes it? Maybe? He thinks? ]
Thanks. [ There's some strain in his voice, a higher note than it should be. He looks at Fabian, then down at the pin, and he no longer wants to look at it, and so finally decides to hold it to place in Fabian's own hand. Once he offers one. ] I-- I can change it, whenever you want. While we're here-- I don't know if I'll be able to do it when we leave.
[ This place has definitely given him a cheat code for his tinkering, and he wouldn't want to ruin it, once they're back on Etraya. He still has to think and make the design. It still takes time, even though he can control where each part goes easier. ]
No.
[ Fabian's voice still sounds kind of strained as he accepts the pin. He busies himself with putting it on - mostly so he doesn't have to look at Gorgug while he's doing that, and that gives him a moment to try and straighten his expression. ]
I don't want you to ever change it.
[ He does at least sound pretty sure on that one - his voice is firmer, though before he looks back up at the other, he has to quickly rub at his eyes. Not to rub anything away!!! Or anything!!!!!!
In fact, maybe to keep Gorgug from questioning what was up with the water in Fabian's eyes, the half-elf very quickly reaches out to pull Gorgug down a little bit to kiss him. When he pulls away again, he's managed to swallow the emotional baby tears. ]
It's gorgeous. [ There's a quick glance at the pin now he's pinned it onto his shirt, but it's only momentary. Fabian is looking at Gorgug again soon after. ] It's us.
[ Fabian's voice still sounds kind of strained as he accepts the pin. He busies himself with putting it on - mostly so he doesn't have to look at Gorgug while he's doing that, and that gives him a moment to try and straighten his expression. ]
I don't want you to ever change it.
[ He does at least sound pretty sure on that one - his voice is firmer, though before he looks back up at the other, he has to quickly rub at his eyes. Not to rub anything away!!! Or anything!!!!!!
In fact, maybe to keep Gorgug from questioning what was up with the water in Fabian's eyes, the half-elf very quickly reaches out to pull Gorgug down a little bit to kiss him. When he pulls away again, he's managed to swallow the emotional baby tears. ]
It's gorgeous. [ There's a quick glance at the pin now he's pinned it onto his shirt, but it's only momentary. Fabian is looking at Gorgug again soon after. ] It's us.
[ O-oh. That answer is the sort that Gorgug expects from Fabian, and when he says no, Gorgug plans to say nothing more. He relinquishes the pin easily, watches as Fabian fiddles with it, compliant, and happy to be quiet.
But he is looking at Fabian. Watching him, and catching that hand that goes to his face. It's good thinking on Fabian's part then to distract him, bringing him down into a kiss that Gorgug easily accepts, that shuts off his brain; that continues to make his nerves continue that funny feeling on inside his chest.
It doesn't mean that Gorgug's forgotten what he saw just now. Or, perhaps it doesn't matter; perhaps the problem is in the way that Fabian speaks, says It's us, that touches Gorgug in a way that he's been noticing recently. Has it been because of Solmara? Where his mind has been since then, or maybe it started sooner--back when the infection of the Im'mari led his thoughts from a frustration in himself to a dissatisfaction with the state of their situation around them. Maybe it started with them in their apartment in that winter season, Fabian pushing out his frustrations out from his stubborn exterior, forcing Gorgug to shift his perspective, too.
All of that, leading Gorgug to these feelings now: of being over following supposed dangers to their worlds with no proof, of spending all his time studying and practicing, and not giving more of himself to those he cares for.
He looks at Fabian, sees his expression, and wants to say something--meaningful. Something like, I like us, but cooler, definitely cooler. 'You make me happy'? 'I'm happy I'm with you'? ]
Cool, [ is what Gorgug lands on eventually; his tone a touch soft, his head pulling back out, though he doesn't move away entirely from Fabian. Eyes glancing at the pin, and then back on his face.
It's us, Fabian says, and Gorgug knows what he means. And yet, there's a lot that's us to Gorgug. There's a lot they are. ]
I've been thinking... I'm getting sick of these missions too. I don't think we've been doing what we would do, if we were all here.
[ There's parts of them that have been missing, an energy that's been lacking from Fabian, from all of them. They've been too tame. Too rule-abiding.
And Gorgug wonders, asking Fabian, to see if he's noticed it: ] Do you want to do some crazy shit and break into the hospital that's totally fucked the deeper you go down?
[ Doesn't it just seem like something they would've--or should've--done by now?
(Note: This is absolutely connected to the doki feelings inside Gorgug's heart, and not entirely unrelated.) ]
But he is looking at Fabian. Watching him, and catching that hand that goes to his face. It's good thinking on Fabian's part then to distract him, bringing him down into a kiss that Gorgug easily accepts, that shuts off his brain; that continues to make his nerves continue that funny feeling on inside his chest.
It doesn't mean that Gorgug's forgotten what he saw just now. Or, perhaps it doesn't matter; perhaps the problem is in the way that Fabian speaks, says It's us, that touches Gorgug in a way that he's been noticing recently. Has it been because of Solmara? Where his mind has been since then, or maybe it started sooner--back when the infection of the Im'mari led his thoughts from a frustration in himself to a dissatisfaction with the state of their situation around them. Maybe it started with them in their apartment in that winter season, Fabian pushing out his frustrations out from his stubborn exterior, forcing Gorgug to shift his perspective, too.
All of that, leading Gorgug to these feelings now: of being over following supposed dangers to their worlds with no proof, of spending all his time studying and practicing, and not giving more of himself to those he cares for.
He looks at Fabian, sees his expression, and wants to say something--meaningful. Something like, I like us, but cooler, definitely cooler. 'You make me happy'? 'I'm happy I'm with you'? ]
Cool, [ is what Gorgug lands on eventually; his tone a touch soft, his head pulling back out, though he doesn't move away entirely from Fabian. Eyes glancing at the pin, and then back on his face.
It's us, Fabian says, and Gorgug knows what he means. And yet, there's a lot that's us to Gorgug. There's a lot they are. ]
I've been thinking... I'm getting sick of these missions too. I don't think we've been doing what we would do, if we were all here.
[ There's parts of them that have been missing, an energy that's been lacking from Fabian, from all of them. They've been too tame. Too rule-abiding.
And Gorgug wonders, asking Fabian, to see if he's noticed it: ] Do you want to do some crazy shit and break into the hospital that's totally fucked the deeper you go down?
[ Doesn't it just seem like something they would've--or should've--done by now?
(Note: This is absolutely connected to the doki feelings inside Gorgug's heart, and not entirely unrelated.) ]
[ There's something to be said for the fact that Fabian doesn't get into a whole fit over Gorgug only responding to something like that with cool. Maybe the fact he made this - such a clear symbol of their connection - already made it clear enough to Fabian what Gorgug feels, or maybe Fabian is at a point where he naturally understands it already.
Even if all Gorgug is saying is cool. That's just a Gorgug thing.
No, what follows after that cool is far more surprising than the word itself. It shows on Fabian's face as he apparently doesn't even bother to hide his surprise at those words. His eye widens, and he momentarily stares at Gorgug as if the other grew a second head, the pin entirely forgotten. (In a different situation he might have teased the other guy with the fact that Fabian was saying all this romantic stuff and Gorgug just starts talking about the revolution-- But it seems like Gorgug is getting spared that torment this time around.)
Instead, still with that wide eye, Fabian says: ]
You want to? [ Sure, it's not like Gorgug never expressed any negative feelings about this place or what they're dealing with. But it had always been so different from Fabian's own feelings. Gorgug was always more willing to just go along with things to a certain extent.
This is different from that. ]
I thought you liked Aurora.
[ There's no accusation in those words - only surprise. The pettiness Fabian had whenever he spoke of the way Gorgug treated the companion bots isn't here at all now, perhaps because that was also just very much connected to jealousy back then. ]
Even if all Gorgug is saying is cool. That's just a Gorgug thing.
No, what follows after that cool is far more surprising than the word itself. It shows on Fabian's face as he apparently doesn't even bother to hide his surprise at those words. His eye widens, and he momentarily stares at Gorgug as if the other grew a second head, the pin entirely forgotten. (In a different situation he might have teased the other guy with the fact that Fabian was saying all this romantic stuff and Gorgug just starts talking about the revolution-- But it seems like Gorgug is getting spared that torment this time around.)
Instead, still with that wide eye, Fabian says: ]
You want to? [ Sure, it's not like Gorgug never expressed any negative feelings about this place or what they're dealing with. But it had always been so different from Fabian's own feelings. Gorgug was always more willing to just go along with things to a certain extent.
This is different from that. ]
I thought you liked Aurora.
[ There's no accusation in those words - only surprise. The pettiness Fabian had whenever he spoke of the way Gorgug treated the companion bots isn't here at all now, perhaps because that was also just very much connected to jealousy back then. ]
I like Aurora, [ he agrees (or admits?), yet with a tone that already voices a but. ] But we're all sick of playing along, right? Don't you think everyone is afraid of causing trouble because they might get their worlds destroyed, but we're usually the ones who do something about the thing threatening the world anyway?
[ Aren't they the guys to go up against a big bad? An unknown force? Not that they've ever been up against a foe that holds the fate of endless worlds, but. It had to happen someday, didn't it?
But there's something to it that Gorgug wants to express, that he's trying. Where this is connected to us, even if he speaks about more than the two of them. Something noticed in Fabian that's been lacking, that's gorgeous as well, in a sense. What he wants to see in Fabian, even if he might like this intimacy between them right now (that happens to involve the revolution). ]
You're always depressed before missions. And I'm not happy about them either, and Riz... I know he hates being stuck on a mystery, and there hasn't been anything for him to investigate. I just feel like... I hate us being stuck like this, and I want us to do what we're good at. And if there's a way to get out of this, I don't want to find out we were sitting five feet away from the answer because we were afraid we would get in trouble.
[ Though, it's never been about them. It's been about their world, their friends and their families. And while Gorgug doesn't mention it, he can't completely ignore it, his expression starting to turn into a uncertain, kind of worry... ]
Is it crazy? Is it too insane? What if we're being dunked right now? What if the answers right there and we were too scared to go looking for it?
[ Wouldn't it be cringe? Wouldn't it be embarrassing? ]
[ Aren't they the guys to go up against a big bad? An unknown force? Not that they've ever been up against a foe that holds the fate of endless worlds, but. It had to happen someday, didn't it?
But there's something to it that Gorgug wants to express, that he's trying. Where this is connected to us, even if he speaks about more than the two of them. Something noticed in Fabian that's been lacking, that's gorgeous as well, in a sense. What he wants to see in Fabian, even if he might like this intimacy between them right now (that happens to involve the revolution). ]
You're always depressed before missions. And I'm not happy about them either, and Riz... I know he hates being stuck on a mystery, and there hasn't been anything for him to investigate. I just feel like... I hate us being stuck like this, and I want us to do what we're good at. And if there's a way to get out of this, I don't want to find out we were sitting five feet away from the answer because we were afraid we would get in trouble.
[ Though, it's never been about them. It's been about their world, their friends and their families. And while Gorgug doesn't mention it, he can't completely ignore it, his expression starting to turn into a uncertain, kind of worry... ]
Is it crazy? Is it too insane? What if we're being dunked right now? What if the answers right there and we were too scared to go looking for it?
[ Wouldn't it be cringe? Wouldn't it be embarrassing? ]
[ Another - extremely melodramatic - groan from Fabian. ]
It's not even about doing it the best. It's about participation. [ Do you get why he's groaning so much now, Gorgug? Do you think Fabian Aramais Seacaster could ever be satisfied with a dumb participation medal when he's always been taught to be the best at absolutely everything?
This camp goes against his very existence. His very soul! ]
They made me do archery with a bunch of people who did not even know how to hold a bow. Me, Gorgug! Archery! [ He has killed a man with a crossbow, why was he stuck in the beginners club!!! ]
It's not even about doing it the best. It's about participation. [ Do you get why he's groaning so much now, Gorgug? Do you think Fabian Aramais Seacaster could ever be satisfied with a dumb participation medal when he's always been taught to be the best at absolutely everything?
This camp goes against his very existence. His very soul! ]
They made me do archery with a bunch of people who did not even know how to hold a bow. Me, Gorgug! Archery! [ He has killed a man with a crossbow, why was he stuck in the beginners club!!! ]
[ Gorgug doesn't have to say it outright. Not with the intention that Fabian used as he was talking a moment ago. Not with the way Gorgug looks right now - because even if the face might be a little hard to recognize as Gorgug, the expression on it is very much like the other in this moment. It's that slightly shy expression that Fabian likes so much.
So he doesn't say anything. Instead he leans in further to test Gorgug's statement. He presses his lips against the other's, kissing him, and-- Yes, even though the tusks were not there at all when he was looking a moment ago, he can sure feel them now, the familiar way they press up against his face whenever he kisses Gorgug.
Fabian is definitely kissing for a moment or two longer than absolutely necessary before he pulls away again, his feet moving fully back and flat onto the ground. ]
You're right. [ He says, slowly removing his hand off Gorgug's face too now - and smiling as if he just simply felt them by hand, rather than thoroughly kissed Gorgug for it. ] They're still there.
[ A slight pause follows. Though Fabian does seem to feel the need to add: ]
You know that if you just showed up as yourself I would have fought everyone who gave you odd looks, right?
So he doesn't say anything. Instead he leans in further to test Gorgug's statement. He presses his lips against the other's, kissing him, and-- Yes, even though the tusks were not there at all when he was looking a moment ago, he can sure feel them now, the familiar way they press up against his face whenever he kisses Gorgug.
Fabian is definitely kissing for a moment or two longer than absolutely necessary before he pulls away again, his feet moving fully back and flat onto the ground. ]
You're right. [ He says, slowly removing his hand off Gorgug's face too now - and smiling as if he just simply felt them by hand, rather than thoroughly kissed Gorgug for it. ] They're still there.
[ A slight pause follows. Though Fabian does seem to feel the need to add: ]
You know that if you just showed up as yourself I would have fought everyone who gave you odd looks, right?
[ He can just see the overthinking starting to happen in the other. Not at the beginning - Fabian thinks Gorgug is valid to say all of that, really. But there at the end he's getting a little bit too much into his own thoughts, questioning himself in that way Fabian has seen him do so many times before. Even way back when they hardly knew each other, back when Fabian told Gorgug to stop calling himself stupid. ]
Alright, I really need you to stop second-guessing yourself midway through like that.
[ Despite the serious topic, Fabian's tone is still a little light right now - but maybe that's just to help his attempt of drawing Gorgug a little more out of his own mind, so the other can view all of this without worrying if he's being too crazy. ]
I don't think it's too crazy at all, Gorgug. I stopped believing our world was actually at stake a long time ago. [ Sure, Fabian may not have definite proof. But he has a Hunch, and when has a Fabian Aramais Seacaster Hunch ever been wrong??
(Don't answer that one. Let him live in his own little delusion.) ]
I mean.. The only thing at stake if you want to do that sort of thing is all of us.
[ Is that the reason Fabian hasn't tried anything himself? Who knows, he doesn't seem to be elaborating on that a whole lot - but then again, it's not like Fabian has ever been the most forthcoming when it comes to his deeper feelings. ]
That's the only thing you have to worry about if you'd want to try anything.
Alright, I really need you to stop second-guessing yourself midway through like that.
[ Despite the serious topic, Fabian's tone is still a little light right now - but maybe that's just to help his attempt of drawing Gorgug a little more out of his own mind, so the other can view all of this without worrying if he's being too crazy. ]
I don't think it's too crazy at all, Gorgug. I stopped believing our world was actually at stake a long time ago. [ Sure, Fabian may not have definite proof. But he has a Hunch, and when has a Fabian Aramais Seacaster Hunch ever been wrong??
(Don't answer that one. Let him live in his own little delusion.) ]
I mean.. The only thing at stake if you want to do that sort of thing is all of us.
[ Is that the reason Fabian hasn't tried anything himself? Who knows, he doesn't seem to be elaborating on that a whole lot - but then again, it's not like Fabian has ever been the most forthcoming when it comes to his deeper feelings. ]
That's the only thing you have to worry about if you'd want to try anything.
[ Fabian pulls Gorgug out from the waters he was about to walk deep into, the self-doubt, so sure of the course of action, but knowing he's not usually the one to bring it forward. He's not the one to suggest the big ideas. Where's Kristen and Fig when you need someone to suggest big ideas?
But Gorgug fixes on Fabian, and he shuts up at Fabian's (gentle) telling off. He listens to him, contains himself. Listen to what matters the most, possibly, and that--that, Gorgug's thought about too. ]
I don't want anything to happen to the people that we like, [ Gorgug admits. ] But they're part of the reason I want to do this, too. This isn't... I don't trust people will be okay if things stay the way they are. It doesn't feel right.
[ Will they just make things worse, regardless? Is it better to have their situation potentially fuck up now instead of later? There's so many questions, and never any answers.
And that's the real problem. That's why he's feeling so antsy.
He's no less reluctant to make such a call, however. Being the one to take action in a way that will impact everyone, in a way they never asked for. So, Gorgug's slow to speak, to say as reluctantly as he does: ]
...I want to risk it.
[ He wants to know. ]
But Gorgug fixes on Fabian, and he shuts up at Fabian's (gentle) telling off. He listens to him, contains himself. Listen to what matters the most, possibly, and that--that, Gorgug's thought about too. ]
I don't want anything to happen to the people that we like, [ Gorgug admits. ] But they're part of the reason I want to do this, too. This isn't... I don't trust people will be okay if things stay the way they are. It doesn't feel right.
[ Will they just make things worse, regardless? Is it better to have their situation potentially fuck up now instead of later? There's so many questions, and never any answers.
And that's the real problem. That's why he's feeling so antsy.
He's no less reluctant to make such a call, however. Being the one to take action in a way that will impact everyone, in a way they never asked for. So, Gorgug's slow to speak, to say as reluctantly as he does: ]
...I want to risk it.
[ He wants to know. ]
I..
[ His mouth opens.
His mouth closes.
They're still holding hands. It's very romantic. It's a date. ]
I have many things in the Manor. [ This is probably not helping Gorgug to determine whether he's getting pranked here or not. ]
[ His mouth opens.
His mouth closes.
They're still holding hands. It's very romantic. It's a date. ]
I have many things in the Manor. [ This is probably not helping Gorgug to determine whether he's getting pranked here or not. ]
[ Gorgug does need to process this. While he can understand the problem here, his brain is thinking of ways it could be okay--like the parts where Fabian gets to show himself off to others about how talented he is. But it sounds like it didn't go that way, or it wasn't fulfilling enough.
And considering Fabian's mood in general about Etraya, Gorgug doubts that he even peacocked much in the process. ]
You're good with a bow, [ is what Gorgug says first, finally. He just needs somewhere to start... ] You didn't have fun doing anything? Nothing?
[ Really, the point of missions isn't to have fun... but it's sad to think about Fabian being so miserable all the time. ]
And considering Fabian's mood in general about Etraya, Gorgug doubts that he even peacocked much in the process. ]
You're good with a bow, [ is what Gorgug says first, finally. He just needs somewhere to start... ] You didn't have fun doing anything? Nothing?
[ Really, the point of missions isn't to have fun... but it's sad to think about Fabian being so miserable all the time. ]
Then let's.
[ Fabian says it so easily. Really, with how easily he's agreeing here, it's almost as if he was the one who suggested it in the first place, rather than Gorgug.. Even though it clearly was Gorgug who brought it up.
Don't think too hard about it, bro. Especially when there's already so many fussy thoughts going on in Gorgug's mind right now.
(Though maybe that's - even though it's not the main reason - part of the reason why Fabian so easily agrees in this moment. Because he can see all the worry cogs turning in Gorgug's mind, and it's always easier for Fabian to take those away from others, to be the confident one so others won't have to worry.
To make things seem more simple when he isn't busy whining about something himself.)
He even reaches out to smack Gorgug's shoulder with his hand. Totally casual here! Bro!! Stop worrying!!! Even though this is literally a thing that could fuck up a whole lot of shit and it's actually very valid to worry right now!!! ]
Are you saying you have some sort of clue we can work off, dude?
[ Fabian says it so easily. Really, with how easily he's agreeing here, it's almost as if he was the one who suggested it in the first place, rather than Gorgug.. Even though it clearly was Gorgug who brought it up.
Don't think too hard about it, bro. Especially when there's already so many fussy thoughts going on in Gorgug's mind right now.
(Though maybe that's - even though it's not the main reason - part of the reason why Fabian so easily agrees in this moment. Because he can see all the worry cogs turning in Gorgug's mind, and it's always easier for Fabian to take those away from others, to be the confident one so others won't have to worry.
To make things seem more simple when he isn't busy whining about something himself.)
He even reaches out to smack Gorgug's shoulder with his hand. Totally casual here! Bro!! Stop worrying!!! Even though this is literally a thing that could fuck up a whole lot of shit and it's actually very valid to worry right now!!! ]
Are you saying you have some sort of clue we can work off, dude?
[ Really, the way that Fabian is speaking is putting Gorgug at ease, even if someone other person might find it too easy going, too straightforward. But it's good to have someone in your corner, think the way you do--and it makes sense, considering the influences Gorgug's had in his life. Fabian being a part of that wild, risk-taking ride. ]
Well, I know Aurora has contact with Echo, but I don't know how much. [ That's always been a secret, as far as Gorgug knows. 'Echo is Echo'. ] But Aurora gave me special access for the elevator, and I don't think Aurora would let us die if we tried taking it down to her level... we did that with Borealis, and he didn't want us there.
[ Was he being a sulking big kid? Maybe, but Gorgug can't say for sure. ]
So, I guess.. going straight down's one way.
[ And then hope they get lucky??? Don't ask him about the other steps. ]
Well, I know Aurora has contact with Echo, but I don't know how much. [ That's always been a secret, as far as Gorgug knows. 'Echo is Echo'. ] But Aurora gave me special access for the elevator, and I don't think Aurora would let us die if we tried taking it down to her level... we did that with Borealis, and he didn't want us there.
[ Was he being a sulking big kid? Maybe, but Gorgug can't say for sure. ]
So, I guess.. going straight down's one way.
[ And then hope they get lucky??? Don't ask him about the other steps. ]
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