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[ Gorgug was definitely not about to sit back down, because there's still the food that isn't the oranges to get. But he waffles long enough because of Fabian's command that he's dragged and pulled down into the soft cushioning.

But he's kinda sitting on a sofa with two people who love him, so is this the time to think about the food at all? Probably not, when Riz is reassuring him. At least, that's how he's interpreting the shoulder pats, and so he starts to smile. Just sits in this nice little feeling and, heck, even gets an orange to peel.

Know who also probably has more to say about everything that Riz just did than Gorgug? Fabian. He's going to talk immediately first.

Gorgug is just going to be happy here. :) ]

[ How did Fabian end up like this? What life decisions put him right here on a couch with the two most cringe people in the entire world? (Okay, maybe not most cringe. Gilear still exists somewhere out there, after all.)

Riz and Gorgug may look like they're having the time of their life here, but as Fabian grabs the juice just to have something else to do that isn't focusing too hard on the other two being embarrassing, he looks like he's ready for death. Maybe he should go back to face those robots again. It can't be worse than this.

.. only for him to choke on said juice the moment the words Bad Lads leave Riz's mouth. Thankfully he doesn't spit it out, but the choking does cause him to get the hiccups when he speaks up again. ]

Abso-- [ hic ] --lutely not! We are not going to be the Bad Lads! I thought I banned you from coming up with a team name for us, The Ball!

[ Stop this. Stop Riz. Gorgug, stop Riz!!! ]

You keep saying that, but you don't come up with any of your own! What're we supposed to do, not have a team name?

[ Blearily, Riz reaches for one of the oranges and bites directly into it, like some kind of maniac. He looks mildly perplexed for a moment, as though he had groggily expected it to be an apple instead, but then appears to make peace with this decision.

He is vaguely aware that Fabian is getting worked up over him and Gorgug being too obviously affectionate, but that's fine. That's normal! Fabian reacted this way to Riz calling them best friends all the time, and look how that turned out! Fabian will be telling them how much he loves them too in no time flat! Sometimes you just gotta bully people into loving you. That's how it works. ]

Gorgug doesn't hate it.

[ He's not saying Gorgug likes it. Just that he doesn't hate it. C'mon, he's not totally delusional. ]

We have a bunch of side team names.

[ Because this is the truth, and it doesn't actually matter what Gorgug thinks of the name or not. He's not bothering to declare if he likes it or not because--well, he's not wrong, and he's thinking now on the multiple different side groups of the Bad Kids as he pulls apart his orange, taking off a chunk ready to eat. ]

What about the Bardy Boys? Wasn't that-- was that the one with you guys and Fig?

[ Then why would it be the Bardy Boys.... but it's early o'clock, Gorgug doesn't have to remember these things.

All he has to do is sit here and finish peeling his orange proper. He's going to make a nice little pile on his lap so he can offer Riz his rind once he's got it all!! ]

See, Gorgug's just not saying anything on the matter anyway since he's too [ hic ] nice!

[ Fabian wildly gestures with one arm in the direction of Gorgug.. who is sitting right next to him, so it's way more likely that he's accidentally slapping the half-orc against the chest while Fabian is blindly gesturing and looking at Riz with his one eye.

Also yes, he's totally taking the fact that Gorgug is not saying he hates it or likes it as him just suffering in silence. Clearly. Because we all think like Fabian Aramais Seacaster out here, and his opinions are always objectively correct. ]

And Bardy Boys is better because it does not involve the word lads! [ It's one thing when Cathilda or his father says it affectionaly, okay. It's different when it's Riz saying it, because-- ] Do you know who [ hic ] was also called a Lad, huh?! Gilear!

[ IT TAINTS THE WORD!!!

And yes, these energy levels are probably a little too high for how sore Fabian's body is, but he doesn't care. Hiccups and aches and fatigue be damned, he has to fight this. It's that important to him. ]

He's not saying anything because it's a good name, [ Riz shoots back, prodding Fabian in the side just in case he isn't already annoying enough. It's a nice benefit to being more secure in their friendship these days; if he hasn't annoyed Fabian away yet, then he probably never will.

(Probably.) ]

What's wrong with the word 'lad'? It's not that different from boy. It means the exact same thing. [ He considers that the word has been tainted by its proximity to Gilear. He taps his chin. ] It's not like Gilear took the name for himself. Fig coined it.

[ And Fig is cool, right? Ergo... ]

Besides, I haven't uh, gotten to the Bardy Boys thing yet, timeline-wise, but I dunno if Fig would appreciate being left out of it. You come up with one, then.

[ Gorgug could clear up this argument about names if he spoke up to confirm or deny his opinion about the Bad Lads, huh.

So, anyway. Gorgug is too busy thwapping Fabian's hand when it knocks against him a few times, like when a cat's tail knocks in one's face without a care for the face itself. And Fabian probably finds Gorgug trying to knock his hand back more annoying than his own rude tapping, but that's Fabian for you.

And what's Gorgug for you? Being disappointed in himself he made a timeline mistake (Riz doesn't know he's a Bardy Boy? The tragedy) and deciding that Riz's demand for Fabian to decide a boys name to be more important than anything he could interject with right here.

So he's going to stuff half of his orange into his mouth. om nom. ]

[ Gorgug's silence - and his silent batting of Fabian's hand - is only met with Fabian's hand slapping against him more. This time likely on purpose, considering he can feel the way Gorgug is trying to bat his hand right back. And considering the fact that he's starting to do the same thing to Riz the moment the other starts prodding him.

Is Fabian still sore and kind of injured? Yes. Does he apparently have the energy for this anyway? Yes. It's what happens when his best male buds team up against him. Because this is clearly a team up against him, Fabian refuses to consider it anything else! It's a conspiracy aimed solely at him!! ]

Can you two stop?! [ He says, like he isn't batting his hands at them like some sort of worked up cat in the first place.. ] I went through a huge, awful battle, and here you two are okay with-- with trifling nicknames for us! We are heroes! Neither of you are helping!

[ Both of you need to be nicer to him!!!!!!

Despite, you know, one of them having saved his life back in the hospital by not leaving when Fabian told him to, and the other one having taken care of him when he came back all bruised and injured..

They still need to be nicer. Look at him. He's upset!! This is stressing out the baby!! Not even the actual robot baby, but Fabian the baby! ]

I mean, technically it's not you two. Gorgug hasn't actually said anything.

[ Because, as Fabian helpfully pointed out, he's too nice. Luckily for Riz, he's decided to take that as tacit approval of his nicknames, because he's never let something like someone thinking he's cringy privately stop him from doing anything. If anything, he only seems more amused by Fabian's theatrics.

It's not as though he made the name bad on purpose. He thinks his names are pretty good, actually. But he always finds Fabian's temper tantrums to be on the amusing side - provided that they're exclusively about things that don't matter, like nicknames - and so this is nothing more than a happy byproduct. Besides, him doing all that flapping about just means that he can't be that badly hurt. ]

I don't see you coming up with any ideas, [ he says, sticking a pointy elbow into Fabian's side. ] C'mon, Fabian. Lay it on us with your, uh... cool kid swag.

[ This is the first time he's said the word 'swag' out loud. He hopes it came out right.

(It did not.) ]

Owww, [ Gorgug says, as if Fabian's thwapping at him can do anything to actually hurt, but is it still an annoyance? An annoyance that Gorgug is continue to bat back at because it is being rude and mean at him? Of course he is!! ]

I'm waiting to hear your ide.. You two are already arguing.

[ So why is Gorgug going to jump in? Fabian makes enough noise that only Riz can properly get a foot in there!! And Riz is right in that Fabian hasn't actually suggested anything except what they shouldn't be. Gorgug just pointed out Bad Kids trivia!! He never said he would contribute a name!

But he'll try and help now, even if he might still be trying to grab Fabian's hand and pushing it down-- ] I'll judge. I'll judge the better name.

[ Come on then, Fabian!!! Put up a name for Judge Gorgug!! ]

[ To Gorgug, pointedly: ]

You can't judge! You'll take his side!

[ ...

Who even knows why Fabian is assuming Gorgug will take Riz's side by default.. Maybe it's just Fabian being worked up and dramatic enough at this point that he's just assuming the whole world is out to get him. Who knows. At least he's still energetic, despite his condition.. ]

But-- fine! [ He huffs, moving to properly sit back into the pillows of the couch again.. Looking a little bit like he's sulking.. ]

How about just going for something simple yet effective, like the Brilliant Boys? Except-- actually, boys doesn't sound great either. That makes us sound like we are eight years old. The Tenacious Trio, then!

What makes you think he'll take my side automatically? [ Riz complains loudly. He's currently complaining straight into Fabian's ear too, because despite Sklonda's greatest efforts, he's never been successfully taught volume moderation or the beauty of personal space. ] If anything, he'll take your side! Bloodrush buddy solidarity, or something!

[ He doesn't actually believe that. He just can't let Fabian get away with trying to peddle an underdog narrative for this, getting equally as worked up as Fabian, though underneath the faux irritation, he shows every sign of enjoying this.

He gives Gorgug an apologetic look. ]

I mean -- we trust your neutrality, Gorgug. [ He sniffs condescendingly at Fabian's suggestions.

(Secretly, he thinks they're pretty good too.) ]

[ Finally, the time of reckoning is here. The Bad Lads versus the Tenacious Trio (and also the Brilliant Boys?), and Gorgug's already equipped with his puzzled, squinting expression after being accused of being unfair in his own court. By both of his friends!

But then comes their silence, and this leaves Gorgug in the spotlight. He pushes his mouth into a cheek and adorns a very hard-thinking expression--one that lasts for a few seconds, his eyes looking upward in thought before they come back down to look in the guys' general direction... ]

... I'll take bribes.

[ Just. Putting that out there, if anyone wants to bribe him right now. ]

[ Fabian lets out such an offended noise the moment Gorgug speaks up and makes that suggestion.

It likely says something about how used he is to Riz's.. Riz-isms at this point that he didn't make the same noise at everything the goblin is doing. You know, yelling? Directly into his ear? Yes, Fabian is kind of used to that, especially with how often his bestie is clinging to him.

But this, coming from Gorgug? That's much worse. It's a personal betrayal. ]

Why bribes?

[ Thankfully they don't know the irony of Fabian complaining about bribes when his own father attempted to bribe him into the Bloodrush team.. ]

Aren't my names great enough all by itself?! Do you think they need a bribe to shine? [ He keeps on putting emphasis on the word too..

There's just maximum dramatics here. You'd almost forget Riz and Fabian got really injured yesterday, and that Gorgug had to spend so much effort and tired himself out in trying to make sure they were okay.

None of them are currently acting like it. (Though probably for the better, let's be real. Better to be dramatically offended than to be sad.) ]

[ As soon as Gorgug offers bribes, Riz is ready, one finger held up and mouth open to think of his best possible bribe (in fairness, he hadn't quite conceived of what he was going to bribe Gorgug with), Fabian speaks up with such indignance that Riz cannot possibly get away with saying anything to the contrary. His nose wrinkles, his brow furrows as he glances over at Fabian.

Now he wants to act like he's all high and mighty? Fabian does? He always pays his way into shit! He grew up as a pirate! This isn't fair! ]

Y-yeah, Gorgug! How could you possibly besmirch an act as sacred as a holy naming with the idea of bribes?

[ Then to Gorgug, he mouths: ] I'm lying.

[ :) ]

...Fabian, are you sure you're not just against it 'cause you don't have any money to bribe him with around here?

[ Know what it sounds like is coming from Fabian? The words of someone who doesn't know what to offer up for a bribe!!

But don't worry, Riz. Gorgug is here to quick the most slickest, subtle nod of acknowledgement. He knows what the deal is here! ]

I just think I could think better with a bribe.

[ He's so smooth about this, too. ]

[ You know what shows the fact that Riz clearly is the sneakiest rogue ever? The fact that Fabian doesn't seem to realize whatsoever that the other is mouthing things behind his back. Or even Gorgug's nod. They are both being so smooth here. That's clearly it, and not Fabian being way too far gone into dramatics to stop and think for a second. ]

What?! No!

[ That's his first offended reply to Riz, but the look he's giving Gorgug right after is just as offended. He's glancing from friend to friend like both of the other boys have gone crazy right in front of his eyes. ]

There is plenty I could bribe Gorgug with, and we all know it! It's just a matter of-- of principle!

[ You know. Principles.

Things weird half-pirate half-elf families notoriously have. ]

If we set this standard here, then Gorgug is going to squeeze us for all we are worth every single time we are having an argument about something! It has to stop now before it goes too far!

[ jysk gorgug is here nodding in agreement about him squeezing the both of you for everything you have, until the part where it has to stop.

he is then shaking his head. ]

Plenty, huh? I dunno about that one, man... I'm the one who's good at chores, here.

[ He grins toothily at him. It's not him trying to brag - and even if he was, being able to sufficiently cook and clean isn't so much bragworthy as it is an indication that he's managed the bare minimum - but rather a promise to Gorgug: I'll do the dishes.

He actually does genuinely believe that Fabian has the better name and doesn't care much about winning or losing. Now, it's just a matter of steadily winding Fabian up for the fun of it. ]

But you're right, of course! It would be dishonourable!

[ You know! Like a Rogue! ]

[ Gorgug hears Riz loud and clear, since who here is trying to offer anything? Not Fabian, that's for sure. They're even on the same page as to what the true goal here is: winding Fabian up, and possibly getting him to break.

Even if Gorgug's honour is being put into question here, which--when does a guy like Gorgug thinks about his honour? It's pretty hard to, after the adventures he's had with the Bad Kids. So he just shrugs after Riz has spoken, acting nonchalant before: ]

Doesn't sound like Fabian's got anything but hot air to offer, from where I'm sitting.

[ Fighting words!! From Gorgug!!! You better open your ears!! ]

Some people here just seem to appreciate my worth better than others.

[ Okay, so maybe winding Fabian up is the true goal than even getting him to succumb. Will he with that? Gorgug doesn't know, but he knows he's having fun with Riz here.

(This may or may not break out into a fight. Even with Fabian's injuries.) ]

Some people-- [ Fabian echoes, starting to sputter.

Despite the fact that his body still feels terrible, he somehow manages to leap to his feet all the same. Jumping off the couch, and then standing in front of it - turning around so he can look at both Gorgug and Riz at the same time. Please don't look too hard at the bruising that's still left in his face after last night, okay, Fabian sure isn't paying attention to it himself as he starts to ramble, shooting both of his friends offended looks here. ]

When have I ever not appreciated you, huh? Either of you! [ Oh, so Riz.. is involved too now..

Who knows why. Fabian hasn't even caught on to their little conspiracy, it's probably that he's getting so worked up that he's determined to prove himself in everything here, not even necessarily trying to win a bribe competition. ]

Think about all of the things I have done for you two before in the past! And then you won't even let me pick a decent team name? You guys would rather go with something uncool? [ He sounds so passionate.. Like he's making a speech on the debate stage to become president or something, rather than something that's this low stakes. ]

See, Gorgug? First it's I'm so appreciative of you guys, why don't you guys appreciate me back and then boom! He couldn't even be nice for a full five sentences! Now he's calling my name stupid! I never called your name stupid.

[ Riz is now leaned back, fingers laced over his stomach, an expression of poorly concealed amusement crossing his face. There will be a point at which they have to stop somewhere in between Fabian going red-faced and him storming off, but the whole ordeal is kind of funny.

And it's nice to see, after how shit everything was, and how serious things were. Sometimes, you just gotta talk shit about team names. ]

I'm a good cook, [ he says cheerfully, as his contribution. He pauses. ] I mean, I cook.

[ 'Good' is questionable. ]

That's gotta count for at least five points.

[ When did points enter the equation???? ]

[ Honestly, this feels like something that would be happening to them in their travels. Some stupid argument, except Gorgug's getting into one (and he has been enjoying those more recently), and goading Fabian like this is--exciting, really. Even if Fabian's bruised up, and Riz, and Gorgug isn't at all bruised, it's good to see his friends light up argumentatively.

And who always does so easily? ...well, a bunch of them if they're including the other Bad Kids. But always Fabian. He's always got an opinion.

Too bad Riz is on his side, which just empowers Gorgug more. ]

He never called your name uncool, [ Gorgug repeats after Riz, an echo, making this clearly 2 against 1. Because that 1 doesn't want to play by their rules in their game, which is also partially about getting Fabian to.

And just to show how easy it is to get far when you do play their game, when Riz says five points, Gorgug points at him. ]

Five points. [ And, pointing to Fabian next. ] Zero points. You've gotta catch up. You're gonna lose. You're gonna be a zero.

[ Come on, Fabian!! Do you want to be a zero!? ]

I am calling the name uncool because it is uncool!

[ Fabian's pitch is definitely shooting up here.. Way up. It's still audible - look, we're not talking Pinocchio levels here, okay - but he's definitely so worked up over absolutely nothing. Riz and Gorgug are playing him like a fiddle.

Especially because this is so ridiculous, honestly. Maybe Fabian would be slightly less worked up if this wasn't so ridiculous, but the fact that he has to listen to these arguments like they have anything to do with naming things is only getting him more frustrated.

It's like when you know you're right, and someone keeps purposefully telling you that you're wrong. He will explode. He looks like he's about to explode at the word zero.

So standing isn't enough. He must do more.

He is absolutely stepping on top of the coffee table that's right in front of the couch. ]

I-- [ He pounds hard on his chest with one hand. And absolutely winches when that is 100% hitting his bruises, but. You know. You got to endure the pain to be able to have the dramatics. ] --am Fabian Aramais Seacaster! I am a Maximum Legend! If it weren't for me, neither of you would have been invited to the coolest house party that Elmville had seen in a thousand years!

[ Yes, he is saying that as dramatically as you imagine it. He's on the barricades leading the French Revolution over here. ]

And yet you two would dare call me a zero?! Yet you say I am not nice, The Ball?! When all I have been doing is sharing my natural popularity with my good friends, who are now backstabbing me!

Edited 2025-02-25 16:10 (UTC)

[ Riz wheezes.

He just can't keep it up anymore. Seeing Fabian get riled up enough to step onto the table itself has officially destroyed him, still delirious from last night's colourful events, injuries nagging at him even as he clutches at the armrest of the sofa for dear life, claws on one hand sinking into the fabric while the other is raised to try to cover his face, though his shoulders still shake with laughter. ]

Shit, [ he mutters. ] Ow, fuck.

[ It's probably what he deserves for riling Fabian up when he's just as fucked up, but in his defense -- in his defense, it's really, really funny. Gorgug's lethal like that. Riz can talk until the cows come home, but Gorgug can rile someone up with just a few sentences. He can kind of play off his laughter as a cough, but he's never been the subtlest guy in the world. ]

Would it really have been the coolest house party in Elmville if Gorgug and I weren't there? [ He shoots back instead, eyes bright with mirth. ] If anything, we helped!

[ He considers this. ]

Well, Gorgug helped. And he's the judge, soooooo...

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tinflower - 2025-03-10 17:15 (UTC) - Expand